K I L L E R
1 hour agoi-just-wanna-laugh-broidiotsonfb 336,938 notes
boneart:

idonotneedthisrightnow:

you are acute coffee pie

you are narrow, scalding and irrational

boneart:

idonotneedthisrightnow:

you are acute coffee pie

you are narrow, scalding and irrational

1 hour agoshouldntmyheadisloud 469,378 notes
girlwhowasonfire:

deans-avenging-angel:

girlwhowasonfire:

Found a better use for the wine glasses

That’s a martini glass

I’m literally using it for milk and cookies does it look like I care about the finer points of debauchery

girlwhowasonfire:

deans-avenging-angel:

girlwhowasonfire:

Found a better use for the wine glasses

That’s a martini glass

I’m literally using it for milk and cookies does it look like I care about the finer points of debauchery

1 hour agosextnoisegirlwhowasonfire 394,601 notes

whatheballs:

This article is great because that author tried to put in as many dick jokes that he possibly could.

3 hours agoguytravalicious 414,149 notes#i'd like to personally thank this author for writing this #killerqueued
speedlimit15:

this dog is who im rooting for in the worl cup

speedlimit15:

this dog is who im rooting for in the worl cup

3 hours agosextnoisetxtsfromtoby 170,320 notes
3 hours agobreakinqweheartit.com 138,655 notes

landorus:

cashier: that’ll be $4.20

me: bruh

cashier: bruh

3 hours agolegalwifikelvinbenjamin 319,835 notes
4 hours agogivingblowjobssexhaver 629,164 notes
ima1ing:


spankkitten:

malformalady:

Octopus eggs Photo credit: Simon Chandra

FUN FACT: These eggs are evil. Octopus babies are evil. Let me tell you why. The octopus mother lays her eggs in a cave roof and spends 6 months guarding them from potential predators and swaying the eggs with her tentacle so they get oxygen. This means she doesn’t eat or sleep until they hatch. When the octopus babies hatch, she dies from fatigue and starvation. THEN THEY FUCKING EAT HER. THEY EAT THEIR MOTHER WHO DIED BECAUSE SHE WAS LOOKING AFTER THEM. THEY. EAT. HER.

This sounds like what my mother said i did to her

ima1ing:

spankkitten:

malformalady:

Octopus eggs

Photo credit: Simon Chandra

FUN FACT: These eggs are evil. Octopus babies are evil. Let me tell you why. The octopus mother lays her eggs in a cave roof and spends 6 months guarding them from potential predators and swaying the eggs with her tentacle so they get oxygen. This means she doesn’t eat or sleep until they hatch. When the octopus babies hatch, she dies from fatigue and starvation. THEN THEY FUCKING EAT HER. THEY EAT THEIR MOTHER WHO DIED BECAUSE SHE WAS LOOKING AFTER THEM. THEY. EAT. HER.

This sounds like what my mother said i did to her

4 hours agofake-mermaidmalformalady 76,569 notes
7 hours agoi-just-wanna-laugh-broramenjesus 122,033 notes

dulect:

could you please fill out this quick survey for me?

image

7 hours agostanddulect 150,222 notes

trillow:

this is the police. open up. tell me something about yourself, don’t be afraid

7 hours agostay-ocean-minded 231,428 notes

codeinewarrior:

me: hey can i have some money?

bank teller: do you have an account with us?

me: nah i just heard yall got money

7 hours agohotboyproblemscodeinewarrior 117,917 notes
buttpoems:

A drawing about how to be the best you you can be

buttpoems:

A drawing about how to be the best you you can be

1 day agojoshpeckbuttpoems 110,758 notes#killerqueued
1 day agognarlysellysus 560,007 notes
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